Expat Dad Feels Lost After 15 Years Abroad

Duncan Forgan, a Scottish father living in Bangkok, shares in a new essay how 15 years in Asia have left him feeling disconnected from his homeland. He worries his young son, raised in Thailand, will face the same challenges when visiting Scotland.

Forgan left Scotland for Asia in 2010 and built a life in the bustling city of Bangkok. Now, simple triggers like old songs spark deep nostalgia, but he knows returning home would feel foreign. This story highlights the growing issue of reverse culture shock among long-term expats in 2025.

Nostalgia Hits Hard on the Road Home

Forgan describes a cab ride to Bangkok’s airport where Scottish tunes filled the air. Songs from Big Country and The Proclaimers brought tears and memories of rainy Edinburgh streets. These moments remind him how far he has traveled, both in miles and mindset.

After years abroad, everyday life in Scotland seems distant. Forgan notes the wet pavement smell back home feels like a lifetime ago. Yet, Bangkok’s chaos has become his normal, with its vibrant markets and warm nights. He credits Asia for opening doors he never imagined in Scotland.

This emotional tug is common for expats. Many report sudden waves of homesickness that mix joy and pain. Forgan’s story shows how music and scents can bridge worlds but also underline the gap.

Expat Dad Feels Lost After 15 Years Abroad

Raising a Third Culture Kid in Bangkok

Forgan raises his son in Thailand, where the boy knows Bangkok streets better than Scottish highlands. As a third culture kid, the child blends Scottish roots with Thai daily life. Forgan fears this mix will make fitting into Scotland tough later on.

Third culture kids often struggle with identity. They grow up between worlds, picking up languages and customs from multiple places. In Bangkok, international schools help, but challenges like feeling rootless persist. Forgan sees his son thriving in diverse settings, yet wonders about future visits home.

Experts point out these kids face unique hurdles. For instance, they may excel in adaptability but battle belonging. Forgan’s essay touches on how Bangkok offers freedoms, like open-minded communities, that Scotland might lack for his family.

Here are key challenges for third culture kids based on recent reports:

  • Identity confusion from shifting cultures
  • Difficulty forming deep friendships due to moves
  • Reverse culture shock when visiting passport countries
  • Language barriers in heritage homes
  • Emotional stress from farewells to friends

The Realities of Reverse Culture Shock

Reverse culture shock surprises many expats who return home. Forgan admits he no longer fits in Scotland’s social scene. Friends there have moved on, while his life abroad shaped different values. This disconnect grows with time spent overseas.

In 2025, surveys show over 80 percent of returning expats feel this shock to some degree.1

 About 30 percent experience it strongly, leading to frustration and isolation. Up to 40 percent of workers even quit jobs within two years of coming back.2

Forgan shares how Asia changed his views on work and family. Bangkok’s low costs and lively culture beat Scotland’s high expenses and weather. He compares expat life to a golden ticket, full of adventures but with hidden costs like family ties.

Online forums buzz with similar tales. Expats on Reddit describe feeling like aliens in their birth countries.3 One user said home no longer feels like home after years away. These stories echo Forgan’s, showing a trend among Scots and others in Asia.

Expat Life in Asia: Pros and Cons in 2025

Asia draws expats with affordable living and job chances. Bangkok tops lists for vibrant expat hubs, with Scots finding community there.4 Forgan praises Thailand’s warmth and opportunities, saying it gave him a better family life.

Yet, challenges abound. Traffic and pollution test patience, and cultural gaps can isolate. For families, schooling and healthcare need careful planning. Forgan balances these by embracing local ways while holding Scottish traditions.

Recent data highlights expat trends. Here’s a quick look at key stats for 2025:

Aspect Statistic Source Insight
Expats Feeling Shock 80%+ experience reverse culture Surveys on reintegration
Job Loss Post-Return 40% resign within 2 years Employee studies
Asia’s Appeal Top region for happiness Expat rankings
Third Culture Kids 70% face identity issues Parenting reports

These numbers underline why many, like Forgan, stay abroad. Scotland’s economy pushes some out, while Asia offers growth.

No Plans to Return: Embracing a New Normal

Forgan has no rush to move back. He sees Bangkok as home, where his son builds memories. This choice reflects a shift among long-term expats who redefine belonging.

In 2025, more families opt for permanent abroad stays. Forgan’s essay inspires discussions on balancing roots and new lives. He urges others to chase freedoms found overseas.

If you have expat stories or face similar feelings, share in the comments below. Your experiences could help others navigate this journey.

By Axel Piper

Axel Piper is a renowned news writer based in Scotland, known for his insightful coverage of all the trending news stories. With his finger on the pulse of Scotland's ever-changing landscape, Axel brings the latest updates and breaking news to readers across the nation. His extensive knowledge of current affairs, combined with his impeccable research skills, allows him to provide accurate and comprehensive reporting on a wide range of topics. From politics to entertainment, sports to technology, Axel's articles are engaging and informative, keeping readers informed and up to date.

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